


Four Options

by danniemv2310



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Angsty-ish, Coming Out, M/M, Super Smash Bros. Melee, They're cute, Unrequited Crush, gay af, jeremy's hella supportive, michael's nervous as all hell, trans!michael
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-10
Updated: 2017-05-10
Packaged: 2018-10-30 08:08:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10872675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/danniemv2310/pseuds/danniemv2310
Summary: How in the hell does Michael tell Jeremy he's trans?While they're kinda high, of course.





	Four Options

     He knows he has to tell Jeremy. He has to. If he doesn’t, he’ll be miserable for the rest of his high school career and, probably, his life. Yet, he’s not entirely sure if it’s worth the risk. Michael knew two things for sure:

  1. He is, in no way, shape, or form, a girl. He’s known this for a while. He toyed around with masculinity, femininity, and everything in between. It took him a while to settle on transmasculine and non-binary, but he’s comfortable in that for now.
  2. He is totally gay for his best friend, Jeremy. He’s a lanky, geeky, nerdy kind of guy. But, he’s nice and cute and plays video games with Michael. Also, he indulges Michael and his love of 90’s snacks and stuff. And his hair is so soft and fluffy. And his eyes are this awesome shade of blue. And he’s this perfect blend of perpetually nervous and clumsy that’s totally endearing.  Anyway, yeah, super gay.



Now, all he has to do is inform Jeremy of both of these facts.

See, he and Jeremy have been friends for way too long. Best friends and all that jazz. People always told them that boys and girls just couldn’t be friends with each other. All male and female duos always end up dating. They didn’t know the half of it. A non-Binary boy (who everyone thinks is a girl) likes another boy, who may or may not be straight and neither of them knows what the hell is going on, ever. Yeah, Michael’s life is a mess.

Michael wants to get the courage to tell Jeremy he likes him, but (more imperatively) he needs to tell Jeremy that he is not a girl, first and that is no easy feat. Playing video games and getting high? That’s easy. Coming out to and telling your best friend you are hella gay for them? Not so much. Michael had four options. 1) Tell Jeremy he’s totally into him. 2) Tell Jeremy he’s trans. 3) Neither and be miserable for the rest of his life. 4) Both and be miserable for the rest of his life, but possibly with a boyfriend. It’s decisions like that make Michael want to rip all his hair out and burn himself alive.

Michael made his decision after trying for ages to pick the right one. Eventually, he threw four sheets of paper in a hat and made his decision that way. Or, at least, he tried to, but he still wasn’t happy with it. He decided he had to go with it anyway or he’d never decide.

 

It was Thursday. Michael remembers it as though it happened in slow motion, but with all focus on one thing. So, as to say, he remembers one thing and all the specifics that go along with it, but he could not tell you whether or not he was wearing socks or the color of Jeremy’s shirt. The one thing he focused on was Jeremy’s face. Specifically his eyes and his lips.

They were in Michael’s basement. They were playing a video game of some sort and they were starting to get high. He remembers the smoke filtering out of Jeremy’s lips. “I have to tell you something, bro,” Michael said.

“What? Are you gay?”

“Well, okay. Here’s the thing…”

“Go on, dude. Tell me. I’m your best friend. Till the end, dude.”

“Ok, um… how do I say this?” he asked himself. “I’m not… a girl. I, um… am, well, a dude…. Dude. But like not entirely. Like I’m mostly a guy. But I’m also kinda fluid and I like skirts and shit. Also, I haven’t told my parents yet so don’t yell or they’ll come downstairs and kill me. Once for the smoking, but twice for the whole trans thing. Anyway don’t like get upset, because I’d probably kill myself or something if you hated me. You’re like my only friend and I don’t think I’d survive without you in my life-”

“Dude, slow down. So you’re trans?”

Michael took a deep breath. “Yeah…”

“But you aren’t entirely a guy?”

“Yeah…”

“So…?”

He gathered his thoughts for a second. “I’m a... transmasculine non-binary guy.”

“Okay.”

“Is that it? Just ‘okay’? Really? I’ve literally been freaking out about telling you for the past, like two months. Hell, I probably wouldn’t have even told you if…” He trailed off. “Anyway! Literally all you have to say is ‘okay’? I mean I was expecting something other than just ‘okay’.”

“Bro, you’re my best friend. I don’t care what your gender is.”

“Well, I do. It’s an important part of my, like, whole being or whatever.”

“What I mean is that you’re still…” Jeremy trails off. “Do you have a new name or…?”

“Michael.”

“Michael…? I like it. Anyway, you’re still you no matter your gender. Like, you’re still... you. You know?”

“Yeah, I just… I don’t know. I was expecting you to like… freak out or something… I don’t know. It’s stupid.”

“It’s not stupid,” he paused for a second, “Michael. You’re just scared. Hell, I probably would be, too. Telling someone something like that is huge. And difficult. But, you can trust me, dude. I promise.” Jeremy pulled Michael into the biggest hug he could muster. “Ok?”

“Ok.”

“Michael, I love you. Don’t you ever forget that. You’re the only person I can ever actually trust and hang with.”

“Thanks. I love you, too.”

“Can we get back to the video game, now? Or do you have another truth-bomb to drop?”

“Um..”

“Hey, speak now or forever hold your peace, bro.”

“Well, I _am_ also hella gay.”

“That it? You don’t have a super ‘hella gay’ crush on me or something, do you?”

Michael laughed. Awkwardly. “No, dude.”

“Cool. Now watch out cause I’m going to destroy your ass. In Smash Bros.”

“No, Kirby is going to kick your ass.”

  
Three years have passed since that day. Michael wishes he could tell Jeremy how he feels. He knows he won’t though. Jeremy’s too obsessed with Christine to give a shit about him anymore. Even if Michael told Jeremy, he’s probably not bi or pan or anything anyway. Anyway, one out of two ain’t bad.

**Author's Note:**

> Of course Michael is a AFAB Transmasculine Non-Binary Boy, duh. Anyway, hope you enjoyed!
> 
> this is my tumblr:  
> officialilseneumann.tumblr.com


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